I’m finding myself saying YOLO a lot lately
A strange occurrence, as I feel I’ve matured beyond that version of my younger self who did whatever she wanted, when she wanted it
I move with significantly more intention these days
And ironically - and because of this - I’ve uncovered a new iteration of YOLO
One where it’s not about going bungee jumping
Nor traveling around the world
Nor spending nights staying out too late having “just one more” drink
Of all things… YOLO has become about permanence. Specifically, permanence in relationships.
If I only live once, I am going to be damn sure I’m orienting my life around the people that make up my world.
Because as we all know - the thing that gives the most meaning to our time on this floating rock is the people we spend our time with.
And I don’t mean investing in relationships by saying YOLO and sacking off work for the day.
I mean YOLO - I’m going to be a leader for my circles in creating deeply rewarding, energizing & meaningful lives.
“You’ve already been doing this Kelly”, you say? Thanks for the callout! Because yes, it definitely sounds like what coaches do.
And yes, coaches absolutely do this. I’ve been doing this with my clients for the last 3 odd years now and it’s been incredibly rewarding. I will continue to do this work. But coaching is not YOLO-ing. It is wayyyy to responsible to get that coveted label.
Full blown YOLO-ing (for me) means creating a way of living that allows me to feel spacious, creative & inspired while being a mother, partner, friend & businesswoman. This has meant taking seemingly ridiculous risks during moments that do not qualify as “good” for taking risks in what feels like a never ending cycle.
Things like… quitting Uber leaving $500k of equity unvested. Or quitting a really well paying (and stupidly easy) tech job to build a coaching business during a pandemic. Or dialing down my now thriving coaching business to take 6 months off to travel with my 4 month old, and then upon returning start up a childminding business.
This feels like the kind of YOLO that lights my soul on fire. Because it means that I’m paving a trail for more people to follow. I’m showing them it is possible to choose a different way of living, and still be abundantly successful.
But that’s not all on the YOLO front.
There’s a YOLO (to me) that’s even bigger. A YOLO I have yet to make good one, and the one that has me here writing - because writing is how I process.
The next level of YOLO-ing means innovating a way to create your legacy. In tangible terms, it means spearheading a joint venture. A joint venture that gives the people in my circles something bigger than themselves to get involved with.
No, I am not starting a business & employing the people in my communities. That wouldn’t be YOLO’ing - it’s a proven way to create meaning & in some cases your legacy. And a sure fire way to burn myself and my people out in the process (& if you know me, that is the LITERAL exact opposite of how I want to live my life).
What I am actively pursuing is not creating a business … but buying into one.
Let me back up for one second. A fundamental truth & core philosophy of mine is that we are all whole as people. We do not need to grow or add to, we are perfect as we are. As a coach, I do not try to change my clients, I simply help them see that they already have everything they need to succeed. The power of this perspective shift is what makes my coaching fucking effective and efficient. Oh - and shockingly easy for the clients, too 🤪
But if we add another layer to this philosophy, I believe our communities are also whole. As individuals, we do not have everything we need to survive in life. For example, I can’t do housework very well. If I had to build a shelter, it would be very shoddy and definitely wouldn’t last. Because of this, I used my money and traded that resource for shelter. I bought my home, rather than built it.
But within my communities, I know a load of handy people! In a pinch (ok, or an apocalypse) I would be the one who minded the children or projected how long our food supplies would last. I would call on another community member to build the shelter, and in exchange I would offer what I could in exchange. Because in an apocalypse, money becomes irrelevant. We would go back to the concept of everyone has unique contributions to add to a community, and all of these would be treated as equally valuable. Because without any one of them… the community ceases to function. Even talents like playing music instruments or being able to tell good jokes or create games out of simple objects have immense value. Because entertainment is a core part of the human experience, too.
So going back to my joint venture. I am lucky enough to have been gifted financial abundance in this lifetime. I have also refined my ability to efficiently manage resources (and calendars, and project timelines) over the years. I’ve also cultivated bravery through my circumstances. This puts me in a unique position to be able to jump. To take the leap of faith and create a joint venture offering that (already) many of my community desperately wish will come to be.
Currently, that offer is a winery. As in, we are exploring purchasing a winery. In a way that our community can get involved by contributing what they feel is needed by a winery. This can be money, yes. But it can also be accounting, or legal advice, or horticulture knowledge, or goal setting frameworks, or supplier negotiation tactics, or wine label design, or event planning, or entertainment scheduling.
In exchange for their contributions, they get rewarded. Tangibly, in either access to the wine & winery accommodation, profit sharing or an equity sharing arrangement.
But more importantly — and the thing that I can electrically feel when we speak to our community about this — by getting involved, they receive access to hope. Hope that there is a different way of living. Hope that there is a different way to create meaning. Hope that there is a different way to see their life unfolding.
And this, my friends, is priceless. And is exactly what the phrase YOLO must be reserved for.
Because yes - you only live once. So if you are a leader, please go and do the thing that will fundamentally change your community’s life. Or if leading isn’t your thing - be on the lookout to get involved with the venture that will give you legacy as you define it.
Legacy alongside our communities is what is worth “bungee jumping off the cliff” for.